Aisling’s Preggo Blog

As-salaamu alaykum,

Like I said in my User Info I am pregnant and have been forced by my mother to write a journal. LOL.
This is my second pregnancy – my first resulted in a missed miscarriage in May 2007. It was a really devistating event for me. Everytime I saw a pregnant women I felt useless and broken. My husband is and was so supportive and never blamed me for anything – I was in self-destruction mode. 

I have PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome – look it up) and was sure that it was because of me that everything went wrong and that I would never be able to fulfill the one thing I wanted to fulfill – becoming a parent. It took me quite a while to be able to visit my pregnant friends or hold their new babies. And of course, I think just about all of my close friends were pregnant or delivered around the time I was supposed to be due – go figure. But it seemed like the one month I was able to simply be happy for others and not feel upset at myself for their being pregnant, I became pregnant myself. I swear to you – the one month I finally come chart my BBT, or worry about TTC (my fellow TTC’ers know what I am talking about), I fall pregnant!

I sincerely feel blessed from Allah with this trust (amaanah) that He has given me. I am still so aware, however, that things can go wrong at any moment. Last pregnancy the baby stopped growing at 8.5 weeks, yet my body didn’t miscarry until 14 weeks! So the sac itself grew, my tummy grew and I thought all was well. So to say the least I am walking on eggshells right now. No lifting, no heavy physical work, just living. That’s it. 

So far it seems like my hormones are much stronger – I have tons of morning sickness (more nausea than anything, not too much actual sickness alhamdulillah), and I can not tell you how incredibly tired I am. My poor husband doesn’t get fed anymore…LOL!

I am trying to get a midwife but they are one midwife short and are basically pulling their hair out with the work load. I guess for now they are not accepting any August or September due dates until they find a new midwife. For now I have to go with an OB. I might go with this one doc here – he’s an OB and a fertility specialist, that knows so much about PCOS so that might be a great way to go. I haven’t ever had a male doctor though so I don’t know how comfortable I will be. I guess we will wait and see. 

Not sure what else to put out there yet. I am sure I’ll think of something.